i have a new addiction! it's called hawthorne heights.

for the past weeks, i've been listening to old songs (that seems new for me) from rock bands like hawthorne heights, taking back sunday, lost prophets, and hinder cause there aren't new rock songs out on the radio now. well, except for david cook. =] i'm still downloading saosin, and augustana. i'm also planning to listen and memorize the songs of flyleaf and paramore, which i downloaded a long time ago. =]

anyways, hawthorne heights is fcking awesome!

their songs are so fuckin cool! as in! their songs are my type: emo-rock. they even growl on some parts. but don't worry, they're not like super metal cause otherwise i won't listen to them. the lyrics of every song are so cool. i downloaded their two albums: If Only You Are Lonely and Silence in Black and White. try listening to them at imeem or jango. =]

i know it seems like we're never coming back
i know it feels like we're never coming back
you tried your best and you knew it wouldn't last.
-this is who are

i just wanted you to know, i think about you every night.
when i fall asleep, you are in my dreams
-we are so last year

and all I had was the memory of what was
so lets pretend it never mattered to us
i hope this message finds you well
i never thought I'd live to tell
what's a dream and what is real, the way I really feel
-pens and needles

saying goodbye's the hardest part. wish we knew this from the start
-saying sorry

close the door, lock it tight
then I'll know you're safe tonight
turn on a song that means the most
believe I'm there and hold me close
-dead in the waters

end this now, we've gone too far
let's take back words that turned to scars
if i could find a way to turn back time
i had to let you know i'm on your side
-i am on your side

this could be the plans for revenge
but these words lead to dead ends
-breathing in sequence

these are just few of the songs of hawthorne. i can go on and on but you guys might be bored. just listen to them, alright? =]

it's just tragic how their guitarist died last December. he died suddenly in their tour bus (i think it was in their tour bus). maybe that's the reason they don't have a new album...

i need you now more like yesterday; the last day i could see you smile.

[ 8 scream! ]

nakakamatay ang maling akala. tama ba?

so something happened last night... about me and a guy. i'll share something about the guy...

we're friends. we've been texting for quite a long time. i have this idea that he likes me from my friend who is his "ex"-friend. he was about to ask me to their senior prom last february. why didn't that happen? well, someone asked me one day ahead of him (the one who asked me first was his classmate, who is my ex). i find myself really lucky that my ex was the first one to ask me to prom cause i don't know what to do if the other guy would ask me first! i'm not saying that he's totally not good looking. he's just not my type.

over this summer, we saw each other at Glorietta. it's not planned or anything. not like a date. eeewww! it just happened that i'm in Glo and he was there too. the longest time we've been together at Glo was like only 30 mins.

when he knew that i broke up with my ex, he's been asking me to hang out with him at Glo. as in only the two of us. like, no fcking way. i keep bailing out on him, saying many excuses.

okay, so last night...

he asked me if the one i put in my GMs was true (there's this INAFL at the end of my GMs which means, i need a fckin lover). and i told him that it depends with the guy, cause i should like that guy. and wow, he asked me what if the guy was him!! oh my gosh, he has some sure guts in him! i didn't want to hurt his feelings, but i don't want to lie too and maybe give out a wrong meaning. so i told him that i only see him as a friend. you know, a cool person to hang out with but not as a boyfriend.

i think he was hurt and disappointed. but even before, i was sure hell not giving him any signs that i like him! maybe he was thinking that i'm just waiting for him to speak up. like hello! grrr..

i shouldn't feel guilty right? cause i said the truth. he'll get over it. i'm not pretty enough for him not to get over with.

let's take back words that turned to scars.

[ 9 scream! ]

Panic At The Disco is infectious! i've been listening to Panic's songs in their Pretty Odd album and A Fever You Can't Sweat Out. i can't help but to feel happy. the beat of the songs are so infectious. i can't stop snapping my fingers and nodding my head to the beat. there are these songs where i just danced away. haha. i danced in front of the mirror and in the shower. it's not a very good sight to see, but i couldn't help it. nobody saw it anyways. haha.

listen to their songs. it's good. the lyrics of some are weird and senseless but their are others where the meaning is really, really good.

i just watched an episode of MTV's Sweet 16. and like OMFG, i so envy the girl. she won as MTV's Sweet 16er. she had my chemical romance in her birthday party! like MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE! they sang in her party! she had pictures with them. plus, the free gifts from MTV were awesome: a ten thousand dollar donation, in her name, to Make A Wish foundation(i think), an iPhone, and a Canon Professional Camera! i want the iPhone and the camera! and i want MCR to be in my birthday! hahaha. my sweet 16 is still a few months away so you guys can prepare! hahaha. =]]

i want to be back to the street where we bagan feeling as good as lovers can.

[ 19 scream! ]

it's official. i'm now a college student. little miss fighting maroon. haha. i enrolled last monday and had my id picture taken. i bought these cool UP shirts. one says, "i think, therefore im from UP." and the other one says, "UP ako, ikaw?" there was this other shirt which had a list of some of universities and what each letter of it's name/acronym stand for. there was like, ST. PAUL - Sana Talaga Pumasa Ako sa Upcat Lord.

there was an orientation and psych test last tuesday. gahd. the orientation took so long. haha. almost all the speakers addressed us as bagong skolar ng bayan.

after the psych test, we had a block lunch. it was fun. i got to meet my blockmates and talk to them. may friends na ako. haha. after the lunch, we had a little campus tour. UP Manila's campus is not that big but it's ok. paikot ikot parin kami to go to our different classrooms.

i have my sched for the first sem. ang aga ng classes ko. huhu. i have a class that starts at 7am. i also have long breaks between some subjects. yey! i'm so excited. =] kitakits na lng sa mga nag-aaral sa UP Manila. haha

we just feel more alone. yeah.

[ 4 scream! ]