April 4, 2005
Settled
Plastered On 09:44 PM


As for now, my tabulas life is at an end. True enough, I still have not found proper settlement for my blogging proper but I did take temporary refuge in my private livejournal, which is actually my former dumpsite for my close to clinical depression. My LJ will only be known to a circle and at a same time will not be private either (meaning no friends lock). I still do not believe in the friend system anyway... (what is it with that?)

Despite this, I shall still keep this tabulas account up until I have everything fully archived.

And don't bother asking for my user account. it's either you find it... or I'd tell you. =.= I've been having problems organizing my net life as it is... with college and all. rawr.

ciao. and God Bless. 




January 20, 2005
No World Changing Things in Here
Plastered On 08:38 PM


Ugh. My baby is still having her motherboard transplant. I'm worried sick. But then the computer guy did reassure me that all my data is safe and sound. I swear, I should've gotten her a new internal cooling system when I had the chance. But her mommy doesn't have the moolah to pay anyway :/

I haven't gotten all the details for the move ready yet. For one, I failed to realize that I can't update my blog in an other computer if I am to place it in hiraya unless I install some sort of blogging code into the layout.

But anyway, just felt like writing because life is a darn dog.

It's really spankin that Coheed and Cambria has been getting a lot of attention from Yahoo launch. And for once I am not at the least annoyed by it. Number 1: I suppose that its cuz you can tell a real fan from a normal listener. a real fan would actually take the time to realize the meaning of their songs, Number 2: And that he or she would actually know that they are based on a comic book XD and that they actually follow a story.

Cried my ass off over a college. Not that I failed any yet (and you have permission to shoot me having said that), just that the parents hate it. Long story.

How do you know when you find the one? How do you know if what's before you is the real thing? Should you follow what your heart tells you? Or perhaps your feelings are already governed by some social bias that you can't rationalize. What really drives a spear up my arse is the fact that senior year is full of choices that's driving me up a wall :/

And honestly? I wouldn't be going to the Senior Ball if it weren't for my best friend being obligated to go. I can feed sooo many people with that money. But people give me that "its a once in a life time moment" crap. *that and I have a boyfriend= ready date. Hello? dieting (a.k.a. dying) to fit in a dress only to eat a strand of pasta at ball night and still look like a pig and pay a kajillion bucks for it is not my idea of a good memory (save for the dance and if ever by some bizaar reason I win another free gift check from my favorite bookstore).

Not to mention I'm better off going to an all night buffet with my boyfriend and then dance to my favorite songs at home. Cost efficient, physical and emotional trauma free. (not to mention hello dessert buffet. NOW you definitely have permission to shoot me XD.)

And college? Damnit. I must've heard a dozen. "Punta ka na doon. Nandoon naman boyfriend mo eh." (Go there! Your boyfriend is studying there anyway). Who in their bloody mind would choose a college because of a boyfriend? Gawd. That is so immature. Even if the lot of it were half meant, how is that supposed to help my college problem?

Damn I'm a bitch o.O

"Yeah... alright you primitive screwheads!
Listen up! See this?!
This... is my BOOMSTICK!"


add: *smacks forehead* GOSH DARNIT! I can always go back to pitas and fix it up =.= geez. Why didn't I think of this before. Damn.
Homer - The OdysseyCoheed and Cambria - Junesong Provision



January 14, 2005
Polishing the Craft (among other things)
Plastered On 11:09 PM


If I am to describe what has the last two weeks been to my life, all I can say was that.... I was swamped. The consecutive days of sleeping at a bizarre range of 12 am, 3 am, and 8 pm was unbearable. Tests come at me like rabid rodents ready to take me apart into threads of bloody meat.

Aint life dandy? :D

Most of my work was actually comprised of finalizing the magazine and working for my yearbook (the latter which I am yet to finish). Being flogged down by drawing assignments reminded me of what Sir Lyndon Gregorio had mentioned in one of his lectures on art. (and if you don't know who he is... well.. >.< poor you. But anyway he's the artist for beerkada).

Most of the time, artists have a tendancy to slack off and the usual excuse that they'd give is that they haven't found that inspiration yet. The usual counter would've been.... you can't just keep waiting. What if inspiration never comes? However, Sir rebuked it with something else.

He mentioned that to be an artist you have to polish your craft. Even if you think that what comes out of your pen wouldn't be the next Mona Lisa, that's not supposed to matter. You need to keep practicing and practicing.

And what if one day you're inspired to draw an orange? Wouldn't it be sad if you can't do a proper circle or perhaps your lighting and textures may be off?

Even if it may be a gamble, I also like receiving work that I may have trouble completing- because it comes out as a challenge. If it weren't so time consuming, I would actually enjoy it with gusto. It just so happens that my studies are being compromised by my extra curriculars.

Ugh. my brain is gelo.

Anyway, This is possibly my last entry on tabulas. Although it is well within my capability to hide the ad tag and all, I just find it as a hassle. It's not that blogging has become a chore, its more of... blogging isn't like what it was before.

I remember when I started my blog a good 4-5 years ago. The layouts were always in frames. And my Varlet had a different aray of names... starting from Broken Perceptions, down to Hodgepodge, Atoma and finally... to what it is now. I enjoyed growing up with my journal, learning from it, nurturing it and trying to write up things that may actually have substance (though I still doubt that I've achieved it). Varlet.. no... my blogging history has become a large part of me. I still have my old logs when my blog was still in geocities, in pitas, my hosts, and finally here in tabulas.

But then blogs became something else. There's the friends only function which I really don't get, for one. For a time and even before, people would add blogs based on layout and not on content. Somehow the meaning of online journalism had lost its flavor.

Most likely, varlet will find its resting place in the heart of my network with val... Hiraya. After accomplishing my first website (Saviour which is an Athrun Zala shrine. har har. I'm a fangirl so sue me), I realized that I've been taking the half of our domain for granted. Blogging was always a part of me... yet I would also need to consider the new. This domain. It has so much potential. If ever I am blessed with free time, I want to hand it along with my energy in developing Hiraya.

So is this goodbye? Not really. Just a probably move. Not to mention updating would be a breeze for me and no more layout tags to mess with.. yahoo! :D

-sealed with my eternal love, kat the magnificent



December 17, 2004
Martyr
Plastered On 10:49 PM


I know that lyrics belong to martyr, yet these songs come a bit close to heart. One of them is actually themed after Martyr. It's like my log's theme song *_* or something. Okay whatever. I mentioned this before somewhere else but there's no hurt repeating it again. Suicides are people who die because of a personal reason. Martyrs are those people who have no intention or desire to die, yet do so for the common good. So basically suicide bombers are incorrectly labelled *_*

Sorry btw that I haven't gotten my arse to fix this place yet. and I forgot to place an information column at the right. The blog is best viewed in IE.

Martyr (Permission to be Taken Away)
written by: yours truly
imagine it sounding like: Siam Shade. With a wicked guitar solo *_* yeah, in my dreams

Black ends, tantric holidays in a moshpit
Pain is shortlived, stuck in a tight grip
But for good reasons one must try
To be, more than what she could possibly
Become, and unlike the world,
You could hope that things will be just fine
Let it out and unwind
Life will always be unkind to those who're looking for

(chorus)
Do gods walk among the others?
Gods, more than beings sublime
When will people ever learn
That forgiveness is divine
Are there gods among the others?
Gods, give mercy to every crime
When will people ever learn
That forgiveness is divine

Dish rag, one night pixie sticks for dirt bags
Cardboard fixtures, looking for rapture
Become unlike the world
And be sure to feel the permanent rewind
Let it out and derive
Your philosophies for the blind
Oh there could be such things as...
(chorus)

(bridge)
Sky, sky bound agents, will you come for me?
Fly, sky bound agents, can you take me please?

(chorus)
When will people ever learn there's no such thing as.



December 15, 2004
UPDATING
Plastered On 08:43 PM


edit: There are still a lot of bugs (esp. getting the tagboard up and running again and with the minor font errors at the right column), but so far so good. This is simpler than the last one, but I like how much cleaner it came out *_*

I can't fix them tonight. I'm helping my sis with her paper while she helps me with a project. I've been lacking a heck lot of sleep these days. So I gotta compensate tonight. Good night one and all. I'll fix the rest tomorrow



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Katrina is a lover of arts, literature, rock, chocolate and collectable cards. She's a resident book whore, tree killer and sworn wife to a triad leader (Pol) <3
 
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